Avatar: the Last Airbender

Oh boy. Avatar. How much i absolutely love this series.

it's also why i couldn't stand to watch the fucking movie.

Seriously, it's the most ridiculous shit ever, even getting past the fact that the storyline had to be condensed from several hours into just an hour or two, there were ALOT of things wrong with the movie, the biggest problems likely being this:

A. Nerf firebending and earthbending, buff airbending, leave water bending the same.

Seriously. So now, firebending is literally that, firebending. fun. You NEED fire nearby to do firebending, which seems kind of a bad choice for an antagonist, because think about it, doesn't that instantly make water bending and airbending top tier?

A strong breeze could probably snuff out that torch they use to firebend, then it's game over for the fire benders. Those 2 elements utterly counter fire bending, with earth bending still being better due to the virtue that regardless of where the fuck you go, there's still earth, provided you aren't out at sea anywho.

Now you may be thinking, 'Hey HelpR you retard, why the hell did you say that earthbending is the second worst? Wouldnt water bending and earth bending be about the same? I mean, they both need the element available to do them.' Well, yes, except for one small tidbit. Apparently earth benders need 3-5 people bending a 10 pound chuck of earth to move it.

Yeah, water bending looks a whole lot fucking better doesn't it? Sure, you still need to carry around your water supply and use it as a whip, but at least you don't need several fuckers to move a bottle's worth of water.

Airbending is just plain broken. It's now the only element that doesnt require you to have your element present to manipulate it. Because it's air.

Obviously.

So let's take this into account, a big part of aang's fighting in the original series was deflection of attacks using air until he could reach a favorable position in which he could win the battle; almost always in a non-lethally. So honestly, what's stopping aang from merely going all commando and taking out an entire fighting force which can apparently only throw fireballs?

fucking pacifism.

Yes, I know it was a kid's show, and to be honest, it was refreshing to see a character that just plain did not want to fight, but had to, because if he did not, that would mean the end of life as he knew it. Aang was a complicated character as he had to deal with his pacifism in light of being protector and balance of all the nations in the world, and unfortunately, this conflict became a major focal point later on. Aang's a pretty cool character, but honestly, did this movie do him justice? Maybe in time it will, who knows.

I really just have one more major qualm with the movie, and it's a simple one: How did the fire nation get into a position of such power being so goddamn retarded?

Ok so. in the original series they had an episode where they had to rescue a group of earth kingdom prisoners who were on a metal rig. Almost all of them were earthbenders, however, there was no earth available to bend as they were out at sea. The episode ends with them overthrowing their guards and eventually becoming free.

The movie version of them is basically a concentration camp with them out in the middle of the woods.

Yeah. I hope you see the problem with this.

Alright so honestly, this first movie was blazingly stupid and did some really bad things. However, you know what I look forward to seeing in the inevitable sequel?

Azula.

Ok look, hear me out. There's no fucking way that shyamalan can fuck this up unless he's really trying.

Azula has control over blue fire and lightning, something few firebenders have. It would be rather interesting to see a firebender taken directly from the series, let alone the most lethal one, be shown in action and fighting.

Here's to hoping avatar doesn't get reamed. Again.

Castlevania

So.... castlevania.

Shit. Castlevania. Anyone remember the last time a good Castlevania game was made that wasn't handheld or completely ignored?
Me neither.

So.... why? Why did Castlevania just fall from everyone's good graces? When exactly did castlevania stop being one of the top 10 nintendo franchises?

I mean, yeah, there was captain N, but almost everyone who was a Castlevania fan realized that they treated simon like shit in the show, because obviously they need a dude to compete with captain N over pussy, but that can't be the entire reason that Castlevania is regarded so poorly nowadays, at least in the console market.

Oh yeah... that's right.

Nintendo 64....
Oh lord. fuck castlevania 64, fuck Legacy of Darkness, why the fuck did the 2 really shitty castlevanias have to be the ones who actually tried something new?

Because honestly, think about it, if castlevania 64 had been a good game without the bugs and with really good gameplay, what the hell would it have been and how would the series be now?
.....I dont know whether to be terrified at the concept of a Castlevania god of war knock off or to be delighted, but this needs to be made regardless because adding in gruesome deaths and combos with the vampire killer would admittedly be kinda awesome.

Think about it, simon belmont is pretty much a prototype for kratos, though I think Richter would be a more appropriate parallel, particularly when he hydrostorms all up in Dracula's face

Com'n, y'know you want it. a god of war knockoff featuring Richter Belmont.

I'm Offended

I like turtles.

As most people know, turtles are awesome, just ask this kid, he knows the score But why are they awesome? Well, they're hypo allergenic, they're cute, they dont require too much maintenance when you have the proper tools, and are generally not finicky animals. They can be trained to roam on land as well as to be friendly and loving to the touch of their master. They're cute for reptiles, and despite the fact they do shed their skin this doesn't detract from their appeal as pets. They're also really good hunters, so about 10-20 feeder fish provides you an interesting display of your turtle's hunting prowess as it fights for it's meal. Pure awesomeness. Coincidentally, they're also one of the few animals that sounds adorable in video when mating
Silly tortle, that's not another tortle, that's a shoe! Well, a croc, but whatever.

The only real drawback to the animal is about an extra 2 or 3 hours of maintenance a week as well as having to wash your hands after handling them (so basically the same thing as any other pet.) So I think we established turtles are great animals, so is it really any wonder why the animal is so popular in pop culture?

There's the teenage mutant ninja turtles, ninjitsu turtles which love pizza, three awesome things rolled into one.... and that's it huh?

Oh wait, there's the koopa clan. Of course, every Mario game this crew of turtles and mushrooms and inanimate objects makes an appearance, even if it's just a token appearance, and while they are considered to be rather weak as far as Mario enemies go, there is still alot of the buggers, so much so that you can barely walk 20 feet without running into one. Everytime they're hit with their own shell after being forced out by Mario's stomp, being killed shortly afterwards by their own shell, they keep trying to fight for the sovereign king of the koopa clan, Bowser. A hardy species, at least in their ability to survive as a race despite being killed by a fat plumber on a daily basis, they have been characterized in games like paper mario as perhaps, not being so bad, as some of them are in fact neutral and do not feel one way or another, often defecting from the rule of the leader of the koopas; sometimes even assisting mario against enemies that may pose a threat to the safety of the mushroom kingdom.

Okay, those are 2 good examples of turtles in popular culture, are there any other examples? If not, we need to get on it immediately and demand more turtle based media! I like turtles, dont you?

-Helper

Big things going on!

So, apparently this blog thing is gonna happen. I'm Oats, and I like to party. I also like cooking things and the internet. Also, I bitch about a lot of stuff, which could be something I end up putting on this blog I suppose. Anyway, I've got a short story to tell!

Last night, my friends Mike Lee and Billings were headed to Wal-Mart to get some stuff. We were at a stop light in the right of two left turn lanes, and there was a car in the other lane to our left. When the light turned green, we both go, but the other car decides it's a good idea to just drive into the oncoming lanes. The funny part isn't that they decided to do this and then realized their mistake in the middle of turning. No, they drove for a good 10 seconds THE WRONG WAY before turning around. It was high-larious, and basically made the night.

Hopefully I won't be completely lazy and actually put up some posts for people to follow. I'm not sure why people would follow this blog, but I'm going to do it anyway!

Introductions, monstar huntan

Hey everybody, it's nice to meet you all, my name is Helper, and i guess I'm here to blog about stupid stuff. I suppose introducing myself properly would be a good idea however, so let's get to it.

Name: HelpeR
Interests: writing, drinking, playing football and dodgeball, but my main passion is video games, particularly platformers, adventure games, and RPGs. Also play super smash bros brawl competitively, but I'm really not that good.

That should be enough to get us started. Now for my first post in TYP I'd like to speak about a game people have been talking about alot lately, Monster Hunter Tri.

Buy it, It's a good game.

-HelpeR

Changes

Alright, this is going to change into a group blog from now on. Just me and some friends bitching about whatever we feel like. I've changed accounts, so it's still the same old me, just with a new name. So as always, if you see something that you don't like, That's YOUR Problem. We've got a right to free speech and opinion and we're using it!

~Arlon The Enigma, previously Billings